1. Transplanted Again
In this post:
*Stupid snow!!
*Temping will happen! (Drat!)
*Settling in
*Conflicting Fire Hydrants
*Vacationland??????
*Chickens!
*Stupid snow!!
*Temping will happen! (Drat!)
*Settling in
*Conflicting Fire Hydrants
*Vacationland??????
*Chickens!

Saturday, March 29: First of all, there is snow. There is snow everywhere. There wasn’t any in Boston, and as the bus went north through New Hampshire and into Maine, there still wasn’t much, just some leftovers in parking lots and woods. But just before getting to Auburn, the snow appeared.
I suppose it’s only fair; I did escape the most horrible winter ever, so being in Maine in April isn't that bad, and yes, I’m so very, very grateful that it’s not November or some earlier winter month. Maine had a hideous winter, like everyone else. My brother, Philip, who has lived in Maine for years, said that this winter was brutal, never-ending, bone-chillingly cold. He also said that the day before I arrived, it was still was too cold to spend time outside at all. But the day I showed up, the weather had finally moderated, and for the next 10 days at least is supposed to be in the 40’s and higher. Philip said I brought the weather with me, like that song, “Everywhere you go, you bring the weather with you.” So I’m trying to be objective and thankful, and I am. But I’m also bummed. It’s pretty bleak out there.
(This is the view out of my bedroom window.)
Sunday, March 30: Unpacking my suitcase, realized that I had not packed any other kind of pants at all except for one pair of pajama pants (red with white snowflakes). In frantic last minute packing, had apparently put all other jeans/pajamas/pants in mail (at least hope so—not exactly sure what became of some items…got pretty crazy there at the end…). Spent day in pajama pants, wishing also for slippers due to all wood flooring being chilly. Unpacking, cleaning, thinking, brooding. Raining all last night and much of today, but snow is very stubborn and still very much everywhere. Stupid snow. Can’t take the hint.
Monday, March 31: First foray out on my own: about a mile from my brother’s place, there is a mall and various chain stores; it’s all asphalt and strip malls and traffic and dirty snow. It’s kind of horrible. But there is a movie theater and a book store, grocery store and thrift store, so I just have to focus on that and not the aesthetics of the surroundings. It’s odd—going into a chain store is like being anywhere, so it’s disorienting to hear a Northeastern accent; it’s like, oh yeah, I’m in Maine.
Missing all the green and whimsy of Portland. There is no whimsy here, unless you count the bathtub and assorted other items in the neighbor’s yard. And even some of the evergreens seem washed out and tired--the white pines have a yellowish cast--and there's no moss to be seen. The houses are spare and plain, probably their inhabitants are focused on heating through the winter more than outside flourishes they wouldn't even be able to enjoy most of the year. And it's more of the style out here, I think: when coming from Boston to Maine, I could see all the colonial style houses, so simple and unadorned and boxy.
Back at home, applied to a couple of temp agencies. Trying to settle in; everything here is a little different to do, and I feel frustrated to have to get used to new stuff again, new routine, new way of shopping for groceries and fixing food, doing laundry, sleeping, everything. It's all just draining and I just am so unmotivated to start over again. I miss being able to walk to the library, and having compost and recycling bins everywhere, and flowers, and my routine.
Missing all the green and whimsy of Portland. There is no whimsy here, unless you count the bathtub and assorted other items in the neighbor’s yard. And even some of the evergreens seem washed out and tired--the white pines have a yellowish cast--and there's no moss to be seen. The houses are spare and plain, probably their inhabitants are focused on heating through the winter more than outside flourishes they wouldn't even be able to enjoy most of the year. And it's more of the style out here, I think: when coming from Boston to Maine, I could see all the colonial style houses, so simple and unadorned and boxy.
Back at home, applied to a couple of temp agencies. Trying to settle in; everything here is a little different to do, and I feel frustrated to have to get used to new stuff again, new routine, new way of shopping for groceries and fixing food, doing laundry, sleeping, everything. It's all just draining and I just am so unmotivated to start over again. I miss being able to walk to the library, and having compost and recycling bins everywhere, and flowers, and my routine.
Tuesday, April 1: Well, hello April Fool! That’s me, the big dork, for being here. Well, at least the sun is shining hard today, yay! The east facing windows in my room are pouring in light, and am sunbathing around in my PJ’s and taking it easy, as am now sick. Felt it come on suddenly last night before bed, a good ole’ sinus infection. Considering everything, it makes sense…it’s just irritating.
Wednesday, April 2: My whole face hurts, want only to nap. No TV, just lots of reading and lolling about. So hard to tell how I feel—am I hungry? Tired? Everything is sort of shut off by stuffed-up head.
Did get a call from a temp agency (Adecco) in the morning, and if they are responding that quickly then it means that they are not flooded with hundreds of applications a day, like the temp agencies in Portland were. Had a little phone interview (in which I tried hard not to sound stuffy and sick), and made appointment to come in for testing.
Brother works second shift, so place is so quiet in evening, but neighbors are near, and though I have not met them yet, am told they are very nice. They family across the lane (with the bathtub in the yard) is quite interesting. The dad comes out often and yells at his dogs over and over: “Hey, hey, come on, let’s go…” and the dogs seem to have a fun time ignoring him as they run around the woods. He’s put up plastic containers on some of the trees, which I think is for collecting sap to make maple syrup?
Did get a call from a temp agency (Adecco) in the morning, and if they are responding that quickly then it means that they are not flooded with hundreds of applications a day, like the temp agencies in Portland were. Had a little phone interview (in which I tried hard not to sound stuffy and sick), and made appointment to come in for testing.
Brother works second shift, so place is so quiet in evening, but neighbors are near, and though I have not met them yet, am told they are very nice. They family across the lane (with the bathtub in the yard) is quite interesting. The dad comes out often and yells at his dogs over and over: “Hey, hey, come on, let’s go…” and the dogs seem to have a fun time ignoring him as they run around the woods. He’s put up plastic containers on some of the trees, which I think is for collecting sap to make maple syrup?
Did go out walking a bit, day was so mild and snow has been melting. Took pictures of a whole passel of fire hydrants. There are lots of them, and they are all different (these were all within a mile of each other), so what about the theory that all fire hydrants follow one color scheme per city?? (I love the red one with the snow stick in front of it--like that's going to help protect it any!).
Also, "Conflicting Fire Hydrants" is up for grabs as a band name. Any takers? The only thing is, you have to play grunge metal, or perhaps heavy metal. :)
Also, "Conflicting Fire Hydrants" is up for grabs as a band name. Any takers? The only thing is, you have to play grunge metal, or perhaps heavy metal. :)
Thursday April 3: Although this week seems to have been crawling by, it is somehow already Thursday evening. Feel completely unproductive and bored, laid low by sinus infection. Still been getting out a little, and applying for jobs on-line. Glad to have a place to be and recover. Brother has completely redone his home, new siding on the outside, new flooring, walls, ceiling, windows, doors, all of it. But then leaves his tools around the living room! He’s such a guy! I would think that I would fix up my home to enjoy how nice it looked afterwards, put some flowers on the table or something, but he likes the way it looks and he doesn’t notice the sprocket set (or whatever that is) on the coffee table. But he is the sort of brainy type that likes to take things apart and build, fix, invent, try new things, so I guess it makes sense to have his tools and computer stuff around where he’s going to use them…I have (well, had—much has gone by the wayside these two moves!) about four tools and they all fit tidily into a drawer. I think it’s a little different for him!
Friday, April 4: UPS arrived around noon. Did some unpacking and more job searching. Gave myself a facial with stuff around the house. My skin looks horrible. Traveling plus having a sinus infection plus the dry air…really, really feeling self-conscious about it. Will try to do what I can before next week to not have red, scaly nose, as to appear competent and employable,as I currently look far from it. Feel far from it.
Noticed today that Maine license plates say “Vacationland” on them. Seriously?? What is that all about? Is that the state slogan because no one wants to actually live here?!?!
Noticed today that Maine license plates say “Vacationland” on them. Seriously?? What is that all about? Is that the state slogan because no one wants to actually live here?!?!
Saturday, April 5: I must say, so far, have really been enjoying my interactions with people from this area. There is real warmth and kindness in the people I have encountered. Thought Northeasterners would be more reserved and remote, but not so at all.
Anyway, it’s early days yet, and there is also a vibe of people being a little pushier about things. Twice at the thrift store I’ve had people stand next to me and reach for an item right in front of me, their arm right in my face, and neither of them said excuse me or anything. So...not sure what that is...
Anyway, it’s early days yet, and there is also a vibe of people being a little pushier about things. Twice at the thrift store I’ve had people stand next to me and reach for an item right in front of me, their arm right in my face, and neither of them said excuse me or anything. So...not sure what that is...
Sunday, April 6: Lovely, sunny day. Walked to mall area and had a snack, sitting outside at the picnic table at Shaws (grocery store), in the cold sunshine. So, so dreary, the newly exposed grass is so, so dead and brown, the snow so dirty. However, the sky looks bluer than I’ve ever seen, in contrast to the uninteresting setting beneath it.
Got home planning to work on job stuff and then the room, to finish it off, but I crashed! Just fell over and went to sleep for about an hour! Am still sick, apparently. It was a lovely nap, one of those cozy afternoon things perfect for Sunday, and if I didn’t have so much to do, I’d think it was awesome. Well, it was, but…the day just seemed to be gone. And then of course I was hungry, and I don’t feel like cooking…ended up making plum jam toast and leftover turkey soup.
Got home planning to work on job stuff and then the room, to finish it off, but I crashed! Just fell over and went to sleep for about an hour! Am still sick, apparently. It was a lovely nap, one of those cozy afternoon things perfect for Sunday, and if I didn’t have so much to do, I’d think it was awesome. Well, it was, but…the day just seemed to be gone. And then of course I was hungry, and I don’t feel like cooking…ended up making plum jam toast and leftover turkey soup.
Monday, April 7: Well. Low this afternoon. Went to Adecco today to take the tests and then had a little interview, and the only thing they have available—although it’s a sure thing, pretty much, I think—is for an insurance company doing claims processing. While this is a perfectly respectable job and I’m sure that a lot of people do it and don’t mind or maybe even like it (?!?!?!), it does not sound at all appealing to me, and I started thinking about all of it, a job that I don’t want, and being stuck in this po-dunk strip-mall town, and having a negative bank balance, and just everything, and then started feeling my hopes sort of crash down on me. Feeling very dreary and dull and pointless. Who am I kidding with this writing stuff? I’m going to work at an insurance company, for crying out loud. It feels like death.
Maybe I’m being just a teensy bit overly-dramatic?
Loads and loads of people have jobs that they don’t like, and who knows? Maybe claims processing is going to rock my world! Okay, probably not, but seriously, you can’t really know till you know, right? And I keep coming back to this random quote I found in a magazine somewhere:
“First, say to yourself what you would be; then do what you have to do.” –Epicetus
Whenever I read this, I feel sort of shored up and determined: No, I’m absolutely not going to like some of what’s coming next, or even what’s coming right now, but I have to get on with it. Do what I have to do: otherwise, nothing will ever change. Any of us can be that person stuck in a rut—that can be one way to go with it. Or we can keep believing and hoping and trying. We can always, always try.
Just, you know. Some days are harder than others.
Maybe I’m being just a teensy bit overly-dramatic?
Loads and loads of people have jobs that they don’t like, and who knows? Maybe claims processing is going to rock my world! Okay, probably not, but seriously, you can’t really know till you know, right? And I keep coming back to this random quote I found in a magazine somewhere:
“First, say to yourself what you would be; then do what you have to do.” –Epicetus
Whenever I read this, I feel sort of shored up and determined: No, I’m absolutely not going to like some of what’s coming next, or even what’s coming right now, but I have to get on with it. Do what I have to do: otherwise, nothing will ever change. Any of us can be that person stuck in a rut—that can be one way to go with it. Or we can keep believing and hoping and trying. We can always, always try.
Just, you know. Some days are harder than others.
Tuesday, April 8: Overcast and wet today, and felt, for the first time, the stirrings of spring. So far, even with the receding snow and sunshine and even days in the 60’s here and there, it has still felt lifeless and wintry. But today feels like something shifted, like spring is about to happen. It smells like it, actually, warm and humid and alive.
Wednesday, April 9: Went to another staffing agency in the afternoon. Was there two and a half hours with interviews, safety talk, tests and then more tests. Even addition and subtraction! Then walked home, down Center Street, which more strip malls and traffic. Surely there is charm somewhere in this town??

Thursday, April 10: A trip to the malls, to get out of the house, and then on the way home, knocked on neighbors’ door and asked if I could take pictures of their chickens. Loving the chickens! They wander around the neighborhood and the woods, using their chicken feet to fling up dirt and leaves behind them as they look for insects.
Had seen the guy calling them in that morning: he uses this grumbly, low sound when he’s yelling at his dogs, but when he calls in the chickens, he’s goes falsetto: C’mon chick-EEEEE! Chick-chick-chick-chick-EEEEEEEEEEE. And the chickens come trotting out of the woods, almost in a line, the last one running to catch up. It's sooooo funny. When I knocked on the door, the neighbor mom came out and she was really nice, and did not think it was weird at all for someone to want to take pictures of her chickens. She showed me their different kinds of eggs—some chickens lay blue-green eggs, did you know? I wonder why we never see those in the store!
Friday, April 11: Can't believe it's been two weeks already. Crazy. I'm feeling more settled, but am also kind of resistant to settling, to relaxing into life here; I keep bracing myself and saying to myself, "I'm NOT staying! Do you hear me? I mean it!!!"
I guess by now I should realize that really, it's impossible to know what is going to happen next.
But anyway, hopefully I will have nicer things to say about Maine in the future. This must be the ugliest time of year, right? It's bound to get better. Right????
I guess by now I should realize that really, it's impossible to know what is going to happen next.
But anyway, hopefully I will have nicer things to say about Maine in the future. This must be the ugliest time of year, right? It's bound to get better. Right????